Professional Football Championship

From SAS Wiki

The championship game of the NFL No Fun League which is watched by hundreds of millions of people who just want to see the commercials. The Vince Lombardi trophy is given to the winner, but they would probably want the Stanley Cup instead.

Contents 1 Trademarks suck 2 Famous Super Bowl Professional Football Championship Moments 3 What else is on? 4 Super Boobs

Trademarks suck

Because the NFL is run by a bunch of dicks, you cannot actually reference the Super Bowl Professional Football Championship as the Super Bowl Professional Football Championship, so some alternatives were suggsted:

• The Wonderful Bowl
• The Fabulous Bowl
• The Extraordinary Bowl
• The Awesome Bowl
• The Pretty Good Bowl

Famous Super Bowl Professional Football Championship Moments

• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship III: Famous drunk and New York Greens quarterback Joe Namath delivers on his promise to win the game as he leads his team to victory over the heavily favored Baltimore Horsies. After the game he is spotted urinating on random parked cars.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship VII: The Porpoises complete a perfect season, but the only play anyone remembers by them is their kicker pulling an Alex Smith and giving up a touchdown.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship XIX-XXXI: The NFC Blue Conference wins every game from 1984 to 1996. The best teams the AFC Red Conference fielded during this period were the Cleveland "Best record of the 1980s and nothing to show for it!" Off-Blacks, the Denver "39-20, 42-10, 55-10" Mustangs and the Buffalo "Oh no Scott Norwood!/Hey at least we didn't give up 59 points!" Buffaloes.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship XXXII: Did not happen due to a bureaucratic oversight
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship XXXIV: Kevin Dyson is tackled one yard short of the goal line as the Lambs hang on for victory and Dick Vermeil gets another reason to cry in joy.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championships XXXVI, XXXVIII and XXXIX: The New England Faggots "KISS THE RINGS BITCH" era.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship XXXVII: Hi, I'm Bill Callahan. I won't even bother to change our offensive playbook before the start of the season in the minute chance we meet my predecessor's team in the Super Bowl so he can exploit it, and why establish a balanced offense with a solid running game when you have Rich Gannon, Jerry Porter and Jerry Rice? I was pretty accurate when I called my team the "dumbest in America" one season later, and it's all because of meeeeeeeeee!
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship XL: Jerome Bettis gets a ring, Hines Ward smiles a lot, and Ospreys fans bitch about the refs until the end of time.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship XLI: Peyton Manning kicks Dan Marino square in the balls and wins a ring. Rex Grossman is proven to be a gigantic failure and Brian Urlacher sobs like a woman.
• Super Bowl Professional Football Championship ** (To Be Filled in Later): The Detroit Tigers finally make it to the Super Bowl Professional Football Championship, however the NFL No Fun League folds 20 seconds into the game.

What else is on?

Since most networks concede that 90% of the world's population will be watching the Super Bowl Professional Football Championship, the programing they throw up against the game consists either of reruns or near public access level programming - often to the point of hilarity. The most popular and easily the most adorable show opposite the Super Bowl Professional Football Championship is the Puppy Bowl (insert Michael Vick joke) on Animal Planet.

Super Boobs