SAS Wiki:Current events

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Contents 1 SAS Wiki 2 MLB 3 NFL 4 NBA 5 NHL 6 FIFA World Cup 2010 7 NCAA 8 Golf 9 Tennis 10 NASCAR 11 Wrestling 12 Mixed Martial Arts 13 Competitive Eating

SAS Wiki

• Everyone's taking the Aspie test.

MLB

• Some faggot hit his 600th dinger
• OH GOD MY ELBOW
• Pedro Alvarez greatest thing to happen to Pittsburgh Pirates since maybe ever.
• Robinson Cano is the best player in the AL, and therefore all of baseball. This view may only be held by Yankee homers.
• Jack Zduriencik is going to take advantage of some poor schmuck for Cliff Lee - well it was the Rangers so they can commence their annual second-half collapse but still get half of a Cy Young out of it.
• Blue Jays still like hitting only dingers. Jose Bautista? Really?
• Arizona Diamondbacks behead front office, rest of world shocked to learn people actually follow the D'Backs. New manager Kirk Gibson shocked to find out that he cannot hit limp-off home run every game. New General Manager Jerry Dipoto trades Dan Haren for sack of baseballs and a used rosin bag.
• Pittsburgh Pirates GM Neil Huntingdon refuses to offer lube to Ned Colletti before fucking him out of Andrew Lambo and James McDonald for PROVEN CLOSER Octavio Dotel
• Lou Piniella straight-up quit on the Cubs to be with his family. Rest of the Cubs quit a hundred years ago.

NFL

• Brett Farve is not retiring.
  • He's also starting shit with his coach.
• GET YO POPCRN RDY CINCY

NBA

• LEBRON LEBRON LEBRON is going to party in the city where the heat is on all night on the beach till the break of dawn.
• Amar'e Stoudemire is Jewish!

NHL

• Flames are struck with a malignant Jokinen
• gets 5.5 million and a no-trade from Ottawa
• Ilya Kovalchuk resigns with the Devils dashing hopes of Islanders fan(s) everywhere Gary Bettman sneezes or something and finds some testicles
• Pittsburgh Penguins sign new defensive corps. Might not be the softest in the league.

FIFA World Cup 2010

• Spain won. No one cares.

NCAA

• lol USC [1]
• Conference Apocalypse 2010 is back on with BYU being an asshat.

Golf

• Tiger Woods got cleaned the fuck out.
• But not as cleaned out as initially reported
• Is now free to sow his royal oats wherever he chooses.

Tennis

• Epic match won by an American

NASCAR

• LEFT TURN
• LEFT TURN
• LEFT TURN
• CRASH
• LEFT TURN

Wrestling

• Choking ring announcers with ties can get you fired, yet ramming a limo with a passenger inside doesn't.

Mixed Martial Arts

• Anderson Silva triangled Chael Sonnen in the Chael Sonnenest fight ever
• James Toney is currently training with Frank Dux and King Mo Mousasi to prepare for Randy Couture
• Brock Lesnar is hated by MMA fans and loved by Wrestling fans. He punches people in the face, pisses off sponsors, and has fought like 3 people ever.
• Must have been the right three people, since he's now the undisputed UFC Heavyweight champion.
• Actually beat Shane Carwin by submission, lol.
• Fedor lol

Competitive Eating

• Joey Chestnut wins again! God bless America!
• Takeru Kobayashi imprisoned for possibly sedition or something I don't know.